…so go the lyrics of the REM song. It’s a long time since I’ve posted on this blog, so I thought I’d do an update now I’ve a bit of time owing to the enforced ‘holiday’ most of us are having at the moment. Surreal times indeed! Who’d have thought, only a month ago, that most of the world would …
By gum, they’ve finally got it!
Well, I noticed a lot of the press reported last week about local councils getting together to persuade the multi-million pound chewing gum industry to help clean up its own filth from our town’s streets. I had a moan about this on this blog nearly four years ago. Finally, someone’s caught on! It ain’t gonna make any difference though. Apparently …
Get a grip on it!
TV and films have got a lot to answer for, see examples in my previous posts regarding the Hollywood swallow and computer noises – to name just two. But today I’d like to bang on about the way people hold some objects on the telly. There is obviously the correct way of doing things, and the TV land way. Here …
Who the f**k are they?
Have you noticed the abnormal amount of time the media (and, it seems to me, the BBC in particular) gives to the American Presidential election? The whole process takes about a year and has only just started. Expect screens to be bombarded almost weekly with ‘news’ of banal ‘candidates’ with zero charisma and cheesy grins as wide as Alaska all …
Standard fitting? My arse!
So, the extractor hood in the kitchen dies. Off we go down to the electrical store to get a replacement. There’s a nice shiny replacement available for a reasonable price. On the box it says ‘Standard Fitting’, which I naïvely mistook for ‘old hood comes down, new hood goes in its place’. But no. Now, if I’d been writing the …
Euroshizen.
Jedwank? Bluech? Fuck, it must be Euroshizen time again. I’m off out for a pint. Why is it named Eurovision anyway? Surely it should be Eurosonic or Eurosound. Bloody misleading if you ask me!
Tracking useless!
I have just been on the Royal Mail web site to track a parcel that was dispatched two days ago. I enter my ’13 character reference number’ as asked, and hey presto! It comes back with “Recorded Signed For™ items are only tracked after the item has been delivered.” After it is delivered? What kind of fucking tracking system is …
Personal service lives!
Apparently I was wrong about personal service in my last post. So much so, the BBC is making a series about it – ‘Michel Roux’s Service‘. I’ve just seen a preview clip of it and OMG! does it look exciting! That last bit was sarcastic. Yet another friggin’ ‘reality’ programme (about as real as Dolly Parton‘s headlamps) with a s-l-o-w, …
Personal service is officially dead.
And this is why… My oven died yesterday and I took it to the oven graveyard (well, it probably ends up in India or China somewhere, but the local dump’s just a bit nearer for me). I go to buy a new one at Currys on the way home. Enter Currys for a new oven. Select oven No.1 – “Sorry, …
Tuition fees
So the hike in fees went through. Good. But instead of rising to £9000 they should have gone to £90,000. Nah, let’s make a round £100,000. It actually doesn’t matter what the actual figure is because hardly any of the bleeders pay the fucker back anyway. The majority of so-called students go to ‘learn’ unusable subjects such as Marine Biology …